To celebrate our seven years of marriage together, Armando and I decided to hike Red Rock Canyon, rather than the typical go-to-dinner and watch-a-movie, kid-less.
In reflecting on the journey, I laugh at how similar our hike was to our beautiful marriage. The last seven years have certainly been my “blessing” years. I have two beautiful children, a greater love for my Mom than ever before (although she’s not here), an inspiring career, an incomprehensible relationship with my in-laws, friends, and most importantly, an amazing man to share the journey with.
We started the day off a bit rocky, as we were not sure if we were going to go to Red Rock, due to planning details (Michele Obama was supposed to be there that day, making us wonder how crazy it would be!) and whether or not we should pack a lunch, eat before, etc. This is similar to our “beginning” as Armando was uncertain of whether or not he wanted to date, be friends, be friends with benefits, etc. The good news is we decided to just go for it in our journey to Red Rock and love and both prevailed.
When choosing a path we both knew we wanted a difficult hike, as it reaps the most reward. This is similar in that when one is choosing “love,” it can be difficult at times. Then, you look up at the mountain and the challenge seems like the best idea ever! Just like marriage! It’s such a happy, twitter-pated – planning, dreaming, loving – stage! When we set off on the journey we passed people on their way down that looked unscathed – must be an easy journey we thought. Just as so many marriages seem perfect and beautiful, knowing that is simply not possible. We continued on the hike and it was breathtaking (literally!) and simply stunning, the views, flowers, scenery, etc. These are little things in life – unexpected flowers, thank you’s, a birth of a child, moments together, card games with family, baking with your children, etc.
With the beauty though came the uncertainty of whether we were on the right path or not, some spots that were difficult to get through, which required team effort, and the thought of will we make it to the top or not? Marriage, again, is not an easy task. One must choose love for it to succeed and sometimes we may have to agree to disagree. Sometimes we have to switch lead roles when one is feeling weakened or down. Sometimes we have to encourage each other that we can make it and that we have each other.
At one point on our journey a man shouted from high above, “Why are you taking that route?” Knowing he couldn’t possibly be talking to us, we continued working our way through crevices and rocks to get to our desired “top of the mountain.” When he boomed again from the mountain top, I yelled back, “We don’t know!” And, isn’t that the truth!?! We don’t always know why we are taking the route we are. We can see where we want to go and we are doing the best we know how to get there.
Because he said this, I did my best to try to head in his direction. I’ll remind you, I couldn’t see him at any point, but only hear him. This time he yelled, “Just head to the top, you’ve earned it!”
Again, more truth! Why would I, or anyone, invest so much time and love and dedication in to something to take the easy road and/or just give up? It simply wasn’t an option. Just like it is not an option to give up on one’s marriage. It’s a bond, a pact – a commitment to love through the rocky trails and smooth paths. We continued…Up! There were points where we stopped to look at our progress, check out the blooming wild flowers and to take a breath. All points in a marriage. Knowing where you come from to get where you are going. Enjoying moments. Stopping to soak in accomplishments and miracles. And, sometimes we just need to rest.
Finally, we made it to the top! And, wow! The views were amazing and the feeling of accomplishment was high! We sat at the top and gazed at the beauty of our surroundings and held hands. Another moment. Seven years of journeying through life together and now we were literally on the top of a mountain together, basking in the blessings that have been given to us by our Creator.
But, marriage isn’t smooth sailing…and once you reach your destination, there’s always somewhere else you need to go…or something to be done. In this case, we had to head back down the mountain. Again, we didn’t really know the path to be taken and it was rocky and easy for one to slide down and get hurt, but we were together! As I tend to do in my marriage, I relied on Armando to be the “thinker.” He chose the best paths and tended to be the most logical in this process. Literally, just like in our everyday lives.
When I finally did fall, as it was inevitable, Armando picked me up, helped me assess the damage and we kept going…together. Again, in our marriage, it is usually me that freaks out, is quick to anger, or to panic in the face of distress, essentially falling down, and Armando is always there to pick me up. As always, he didn’t fail me.
The hike was a journey. A beautiful journey with great conversation, sweat, no tears (but emotion!), bruises, commitment, determination, love and togetherness. Although it wasn’t life-altering or an incredible experience, it can be related to our marriage, as it is a journey of many emotions and experiences, and although the road becomes tough at times the view and the moments that create the journey are all so worth it!
Thank you Armando for the journey, I too am looking forward to getting wrinkles upon wrinkles together!
