In a quiet, calm place I can sit back and look at the beauty of parenting without freaking out at all the “what if’s” to come. Instead of the heart-pounding, moment stopping stress moments, I see the tender moments: the moments of cuddling, simple “I love you lots and lots, forever and ever’s”, or the “Mom, you are the best’s.” The day-to-day routine of getting up, dressing, hairstyles, lunches being packed, running out the door, drop and go, pick-up and go, snacks, what’s for dinner, bath time and other misc. “agenda” items tend to consume each day and sometimes those tender moments seem to be few and far between and/or lost. Then, something great happens. The kids stop time, or at least it seems. They spring something on you that is so unexpected and so full of joy that you remember why you do this and why it’s so magical. And, why all those “what if’s” will work out and be superseded by beautiful, tender moments your whole life through.
In the car, on the way to Grammie and Papa’s house, I asked Aydon what he wanted to be when he grows up and he said, “An airplane driver.” Alina quickly followed that up with, “I’m going to be a seed planter and I’m going to fix pets.” Armando and I glanced at each other and for that moment we both felt that swell of our hearts, loving each other and the moment of confirmation that we are giving our children the seeds they need for success.
Or the moment in the middle of the night when Aydon is sneaking into our bed because he “saw monsters” and he climbs over me to get between Daddy and I, and in the process, he flashes me a huge grin.
Then, there are the many moments when Alina and Aydon ogle over Olivia and her arrival. Alina already has the morning hair schedule planned. “You will do my hair and I will do Olivia’s – at the same time.” She is so excited to share a room with baby Olivia and help take care of her and insists that, “brother will change the gross diapers.”
In the moments when they simply respond with “Okay!” when asked to do something, or the moments of excitement in regard to what they’ve learned at school that day (“Mommy! Did you know it’s Dr. Seuss’ birthday? And, he wrote The Cat and the Hat!), or the moments where I have assumed they are going to melt down and/or not behave and they surprise me with the best behavior ever. The freaking out subsides. The feeling of knowing it will all be alright fills my spirit, as I realize how many positive things we have aligned, and certainly working in our favor.
